As I was watching Thelma & Louise the other night, where a very young Brad Pitt was parading without his shirt on like he had nothing better to do, it suddenly struck me. Why do men have nipples? It’s not like they need them for anything. As men and women are made on a common chromosomal platform, it may be cheaper for the producer to have nipples as standard. Who knows? Other explanations that crossed my mind include:
- it takes one to know one, so if they hadn’t nipples, maybe they couldn’t appreciate what women have so well
- if men didn’t have nipples, they’d be at a disadvantage when it comes to piercings
- nipples may come in handy if they ever decided to get an upgrade and change their sex
- because having just one body part that can get hard is simply not enough
- because men love anything with buttons and it would be said if they didn’t have a pair of their own
- to give women something to munch on as well
- because the place would look sad and empty without them.